random thoughts on life

Oh Yeah!

2010-12-23T00:12:00.002-06:00

So yeah, O yeah! I love this time of year, I love this season. I am reminded each and every day to be thankful for what I have. I have lots and lots and lots of things to be grateful for! Children, Family, School, Employment, Health, Friends. I love this season, time of year! Right now, I am totally digging life! Doesn't get better than this folks! First semester of school------done! Yeah! O Yeah!

Thanks!

2010-09-29T17:25:00.003-06:00

As I sit here today, after doing dishes, by hand I might add and scrubbing the mudroom floor in my hands and knees, I am reminding how thankful I am to be so blessed!! (run on sentence anyone?) Dishes mean I have food in my pantry/fridge and the means to cook it with. While I scrubbed my mud room, I am reminded I have two legs and feet with which to move my body. I am also reminded I have the means to purchase clothing. By purchasing clothing, I am reminded of my children, how thankful I am for them. I am doing homework with B and I am reminded how thankful I am she is able to go to school to learn and how I am able to spend the time with her to help her learn. How thankful I am for school and the opportunity to go to school. Thankful for teachers and the calling they have! I am thankful for my job, I love what I do! I am thankful for the opportunity to work, being able to work, having the knowledge to work. I am thankful for cleaning cause that means I have a house to clean. I love my children, love my family, love my friends!!! I am so, So, SO VERY THANKFUL TODAY!!!

PLUS!! Today was gorgeous and I was off!! WHOOOO HOOOOOO!!!

Life, or at least something......................

2010-09-24T22:10:00.002-06:00

Life, as I know it, has been going pretty well, extremely well. I finished my first course on my BSN track. I managed to only get a B, can you tell I am not really pleased about that? My children are doing fabulously in school, although M spends a little too much time on facebook, don't we all? K has started football, starting QB for the A team, whoo hooo! B is worried he will get hurt, poor thing. And can I just say.................thank you to BDB. You make my life better! Toodle-looo!

?????

2010-03-14T12:21:00.002-06:00

I am having a bad day. I don't know why, don't care to delve deeper, just am having a bad day. I don't want to go anywhere, do anything, see anyone, talk to friends, talk to family, see a movie, see the sun, nope!! NOTHING!!! I don't want to do/see/hear/feel anything. Don't call/write/text/sky write/whatever. just leave me alone.

let me have my bad day..............................

New Happenings............

2010-01-31T18:29:00.002-06:00

I know, I am horrible, I haven't updated, I have been lazy. I have so much going on, so many things.

First of all, we moved, into a new house, well for us anyway. We now live in Bryan. We love our house. We are slowly changing the wall coverings, from 1970s wallpaper to paint and/or anything else from this century.

Secondly, the kids started new schools. From a 1A to 5A, big shocker! They are doing so much better than they were in N'gee. I am very proud of them!!

Lastly, we are doing great! I mean GREAT!!! Love you all!

US!

Interesting

2009-08-11T10:12:00.002-06:00

I always find it interesting, this blogging thing, a window into someone else's life. The triumphs, heartaches, silliness and struggles. I read everyone's blog that I know, even some of those I don't. The part that I like most about blogging is this, it is extremely personal to me, I have been able to share my issues on life, and while I know this is a public forum, I still can talk about things freely.

Blogging has helped me through my mother's illness and her death, my singleness and not, my children's issues and some other things I am sure to have forgotten.

It makes me realize how close and similar we all are. What struggles the Jackson's are going through, I went through. The fun times the distant Holloway family has, guess what? me too! Blogging makes this world a little smaller for me. I know I am horrible about commenting, I will try and do better. Just know this...........Reading blogs is something I do quite regularly. Just call me Tom, ya know peeking tom.

Off to the orthodontist, Maycie needs an adjustment!!

nitey nite nite

2009-07-31T01:38:00.000-06:00

Can't sleep, no dreams, toss and turn, freeze. Help!

2009-07-28T16:31:00.001-06:00

I have a decision to make, not an easy one, don't know what will happen or what to do..................ugh! kids

Lazy Sundays

2009-06-07T16:35:00.002-06:00

So here I sit..........in Da's house with Debbie and two of her kids, two of her grandchildren and my youngest. She is totally crazy!!

She just gave us the "diva stance" Like I needed to know that!

I am excited for Dad to get remarried in August. Having, no getting, to watch Dad blend his family will be fun! Welcome to the blender dad!!

Love Y'all!

Nae

road trippin'

2009-06-02T09:45:00.000-06:00

here we go! Idaho is the destination.Grandma Gropp has completed her mortal journey. She is visiting and lovin' on Grandpa and my mom. We love you and will miss you till we meet again.

I'mmmmmmmmmm Baaaaaaaaccccccccccckkkkk!

2009-03-23T13:21:00.001-06:00

My computer has been repaired. I have a brand spanking new modem here at my house. I am officiallly BACK BACK, yes, that's right I am bbbbbaaaaaacccccckkkkkkk!

yippppppppeeeeeeeeee

babies

2009-03-01T14:46:00.003-06:00

I am in love with babies! My sister just had a precious baby boy! Check him out at www.jmholloway.blogspot.com I am in love!

I got to play with Emma, Elijah, Cailyn and Jessica today. I love the smells, mostly............not Jessica after a whole lot of grape juice though. and all the giggles!

Keep 'em coming!

toddlers

2009-02-25T09:13:00.002-06:00

So I am toddler sitting. Well, sort of. I have come to Mineral Wells to watch my neices while my sister has her third child, a boy! I am stoked! I cannot wait to meet David Christopher! Or DC? These girls are such sweet people. Cailyn loves to help, Jessica is adorable. Mindi has a beautiful home here and I love spending time with her. We have had fun in the short time I have been here!

More to come!

UGH

2009-02-17T14:57:00.001-06:00

I am still without internet, actually I have internet, it's just the gosh darn computer I am without, and mostly cause I am cheap and didn't want to buy a new one or pay to have it fixed. Wish me luck and prayers for my computer to be back soon!

Computer issues

2009-02-08T15:30:00.000-06:00

So here is the 411..........I have computer issues. My home computer......8 years old btw has gone to the computer hospital to have computer surgery. I cannot work from home and I cannot access anything from home.

People, I am FINE!!! Just don't have computer access.

So as I write this from work..........don't tell.....please!

Love y'all!

happy birthday Memema! We love you!

Green Earth

2009-01-15T14:16:00.002-06:00

I was introduced to the wonderful website via my sister...........Thanks Minders! I am in LOVE! I have searched, joined, browsed, claimed, exclaimed, wondered, worried and thoroughly enjoyed this amazing group of people and their vision to save the planet, one free thing given away at a time. Go see for yourself.........www.freecycle.org I love this site! I am a member of 4 groups, just to see if I can find things that are totally cool. Let me list a few of the things I have claimed.

1) Round pedestal table with four chairs for the new apartment, needs to be refinished but I like that sort of thing

2) several yards of fabric...thanks Da for picking it up for me

3) white sleigh crib for my sister and the soon to be David

4) long dresser for Paula, needs to be refinished but she and I are going to collaborate on that

I am way stoked! I love this group!!! I have told everyone I know about this thing!

Here are some of the more bizarre things I have seen posted....

1) four things of gel, new, unused, just don't use the stuff at my house and one package of dark brown/black just for men hair color, package has been opened but container has not

2) large box of women's hygiene products.........call Steve at xxx-xxxx to come claim

There, of course, are other weird things posted but these two stick out in my mind........Wowser!

Go and try it out........see what you think! Leave me the most bizarre things about your neck of the woods! Happy Freecycling!

I will post pics from before and after each project when done!

2009

2009-01-12T10:18:00.002-06:00

I cannot, will not, ok, have to believe we are in the year 2009. I remember as a kid, we were all asked to figure out how old we would be in the year 2000. I remember thinking 25 was REAL old. Now y'all know how old I am. :) I will tell you my age for "old" gets older every year.

2009 holds many promises for my family and me. I have decided to get healthier by losing weight this year. Well on my way, 30 pounds down and many more to go.

Here are some of our/my goals.....

1) Redo my kitchen. I want to make my kitchen something I want to cook in. Right now I hate it. It is cramped and not very user friendly.

2) Build a one bedroom apartment on the side of our house. Yeah! I can't wait to decorate a small space

3) Have a HUGE garage sale to clean out and get rid of all the things I haven't used in over 2 years

4) Start painting and decorating my house. I have carte blance, my wonderful husband says

5) pay off some of our bills, we have a plan..........can't wait

6) seriously think about going back to school in the fall

7) lose the rest of my weight, can't wait

8) spend more time with my amazing husband

9) finish all my craft projects

10) chaparone Maycie's first church dance! I refuse to believe my baby will be 14 this year............ugh! I am old! LOL

There are so many things we want to do this year. It's exciting. A whole new year to live and love through!

HAPPY NEW YEAR Y'ALL!

Snow!

2008-12-11T09:38:00.002-06:00

Yesterday morning, while I was driving to work, this strange white stuff was floating down from the sky! I wondered aloud, "what can this be? I live in Texas!" I filtered through my mind, back to when I was a child, for the answer. Images of precipitation and seasons came to my mind. "It must be SNOW!" Yessireebob! Snow was coming down in huge white beautiful flakes. The world is so pretty when it snows. However, Texans are notorious for not having any 'earthly clue' on how to drive in bad weather. Now, I have, as previously posted, 50 minutes of time allowed to drive to work, rain, shin, sleet or snow. It thoroughly irritates me to have to be behind Grandpa Billy Bob Joe when I am in a hurry. I was thrilled with the snow though. Sorry, didn't get pics. I am sure it will snow again. It also reminds me to say.........MERRY CHRISTMAS!

ZZZzzzzzzsssss

2008-12-03T17:44:00.003-06:00

I think it is most interesting, don't you? I have some news.......

1) I have been invited to become a member of the leadership team at work.

2) I had to get up on my day off and drive in to work for a meeting EARLY!

3) I didn't get to sleep in after working for 3 days in a row

4) I pretty much remember most conversations that happen when I am woken up

5) One of my kids tried to trick me today regarding #4, asking what the convo was about......ha ha ha, I remembered!

6) #5 didn't work, he he he

I am excited to be part of the leadership team. I was specifically asked to be part of this. I have only worked here for not quite 18 months. I feel valued as an employee and listened to regarding my ideas. This does however mean I will be doing extra things, some of which I am already doing! It is a wonderful thing to be able to further my career where I have very much enjoyed working.

Random photo of one of my angels! Isn't she gorgeous? Thanks Linda for the pic!!

UPDATE

2008-12-01T22:17:00.001-06:00

I know I should be the very last to gripe............but am striving to do better. Please y'all..........update!

Love ya!

paperwork

2008-12-01T22:13:00.003-06:00

I don't know how many of you have loads and mounds of paperwork in your house. What I mean is papers that require work to get rid of them. I am not just talking about junk mail, everyone has that! I am talking paper bills and the lot. The problem with ebill, in my honest opinion, is we already have tons, TONS of spam in our inbox. I worry that we will just delete those pesky little ebills. I may have to open an email account just for the ebills cause we cannot find all the bills that are sent to us in the mail. For those of you who KNOW me, I am not very organized. Shocking! I know. Ha ha ha ha ha ha..........

I need a secretary, shredder and a million dollars in unmarked bills. Right?

Night

Traveling and work

2008-11-30T22:24:00.002-06:00

I work 45 minutes away in Bryan. Now, I know I drive too fast. I just can't seem to get up early enough in the morning to not have to speed. On the way home is when I call all my family and friends. Seriously, if you want, I can call at 6 am when I am on the road! Y'all just holler if you want me too! On the way home, I usually get a phone call somewhere between Bryan and home. There is not a "real" grocery store between those areas and me. There is only a glorified convenience store called Bob's. I constantly get a phone call asking for milk, a gallon in one day is the new record, bread or any assortment of items needed at the house. Did I mention I work until about 7:00 pm? Did I mention they all have my work phone number? Hmmmm.......they do! I pass three grocery stores on my way home out of Bryan. We need more planning!

Tonight on the way home, I stopped to pick up milk. Jacob met me in Normangee dropping off his girlfriend. He states, "Lynnae be careful around Hilltop cause the hogs are out and there are lots of them." Needless to stay, I drove about 40 mph on the way home to avoid any animals. It always scares me, the possibility of hitting any wild things. I did make is safely home! Yeah me!!!

Toodles.............muuuaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!

Football, weather and Texas roads

2008-11-29T19:33:00.003-06:00

I am very disappointed. Our Friday night ritual has ended this season. I have to say, I am very blessed to be part of my son's football career. He is a wonderful player and I can proudly say, I have only missed one of his games this year! Beat that! We have for the past three weekends traveled at least an hour and half to watch the Normangee Panthers Football team play their hearts out in the playoffs. We have succeeded in beating two teams, Itasca and Evadale. The last game was against Maud Cardinals in Whitehouse, Texas. This little community was over two hours away from us up Hwy 79. The rain was coming down in sheets so we stopped at the Wal-mart in Jacksonville for plastic ponchos. We all came prepared, cow bells, coats, blankets, gloves, hats, stadium seats, etc. The game was uber exciting. We were down 21 to 6 at the half. Our boys, mine included, battled back to 22 to 21 in the third quarter. The fans in the stands were wild with excitement. Our cow bells were ringing with glee. We were gonna "pluck the cardinals"! Needless to say, the Cardinals did overcome the Panthers but we are insanely proud of our players!

As a sidebar, my heart and prayers go out tonight to the Harris and Reyes families. Kylee Harris lost her life on Hwy 79 after a car wreck. Your families will be in my prayers and thoughts.

laughter! how hilarious

2008-11-29T19:29:00.002-06:00

My mind somehow wonders what people are up to at any given moment! LOL I received the funniest thing through email today that had me so very tickled I had to share with those around me. Loved it!

I hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving, remembering all the things we are each and individually thankful for.

Some of my things are:

My wonderful loving husband

My fabulous kids, all five of them

My glorious job

My home

My family

My mother's influence in my life

My father's great and quirky sense of humor and taking walks with him

My aunt for allowing us to come and invade her home for Thanksgiving

My relationship with my Memema, I feel so very blessed

This list goes on and on!

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Missing

2008-09-29T19:31:00.004-06:00

Last night I was flipping through channels on the boob tube and found the last half of my mother's favorite movie, I watched the rest of the movie and cried when I saw his hands on her lips. Y'all know what I am talking about. I couldn't help but miss my mother more and more. I wish she was here to talk to, I miss her advice. I often wonder how long it takes to get on with my life. I miss her terribly.

So, tonight was open house at the school. My children go to a very, VERY small school. Keaton's teacher from last year asked me how things were going with my mother. I bawled right in front of her and then Keaton started to cry as well. I am missing her more each day. How do you "get over it?" Any advice?

Which one????

2008-07-21T13:31:00.006-06:00

I recently made two baby quilts. I have a new niece and a soon to be new niece. I started with one and decided to make two. I gave my brother the choice of the two.............he gave the choice to his wife. Which one will she choose for baby Emma?

Angels

2008-07-19T12:11:00.004-06:00

The most amazing person I have known in my life has now passed over into Heaven. I will truly miss my mother, best friend, confidante and role model. I thoroughly enjoyed taking care of her these last two months. She taught me so very much, but most of all her grace and good will for others have been such an example to me and my family. Thanks for all of y'all good wishes and the things that each of you have done.

Check out this link: http://www.oakcrestwaco.com/ for more information.

Lazy Days?

2008-07-07T08:51:00.002-06:00

First of all, no new pictures..............at least not with me.

I dropped off my precious babies at the airport on Tuesday and watched their plane take off for only the second time in my life. They are on their way to Florida to visit their father for turns out to be 7 weeks. I miss them terribly! They will have such fun seeing their father.

Sunday--my youngest went to stay with her father for a whole week! That is the longest she has been gone in her whole life! I am on total withdrawal!

Now to my lazy days!

I sleep on a twin bed, new mattress--thank you Da! next to my mother each night. I either stay up until around midnight for that round of meds or else set my alarms to wake up for THE REGIMEN. I then try and go back to sleep. Now for those of y'all that know me, not an easy task. I am again awakened by a second alarm at 6 am for those meds. Sometimes during the night I am awakened for a bathroom break. Needless to say, I am not getting a whole lot of rest.

I have thought long and hard about this.............there is NOWHERE I would rather be. Although I don't really enjoy what I am doing, I don't want anyone else doing these things for my mother. I feel truly blessed to be the one taking care of her. Doing this makes me realize something, cancer, in any form, inhales vigorously!

I have to admit, I cry way to often! NEWS FLASH you say? NOT!!! Every little loss of independence she experiences is a very real loss of quality of life. I know how hard it is for me to witness these things, how hard must it be for her to live through?

On a side note, I have the most wonderful husband! He has been working for something like 3 weeks straight. He is my rock! I come home to work and cry on his shoulder and he just lets me. He doesn't give me grief about being gone too long or my being such a baby. There is a reason God sent him to me. I just hope he knows how much I love him.

Thanks for all your kind notes, calls, letters and such. I truly love all y'all!

More and more Colorado

2008-04-10T19:48:00.003-06:00

Jacob at the Pinkerton Hot Springs
The only snow at Kyle's house. The older boys were making snowballs and throwing them at the kids on the trampoline, across the yard
Snowballs! Bombs away!
More Colorado snow
Frozen waterfall on the way to Wolf Creek

Colorado!!

2008-04-10T09:19:00.005-06:00

We, being Texans, had to take lots of pictures of the snow
Our first day of playing in the snow
On the way to play in the snow
Ethan and Jacob dreaming of owning a bike----------this is Kyle's
Frozen pond in Cortez

Spring Break!

2008-03-25T08:50:00.001-06:00

On March 7th of this year we loaded up the tired mini-van with kids and clothes and ski junk and drove out of Hilltop on the trek up to see Kyle and his family in Colorado. Here is what we looked like--or rather the back of the mini-van looked like on the way up.

This was Doug's first time up that way, so we took several pictures. We also stopped in New Mexico at mile marker 40 to look for arrowheads, something Doug was told you could find on the side of the road. We all got out, 'cept Becca who said, "I will just stay here, it's too cold!". Keaton thought he found one, but he didn't. We took the picture anyway. It was very interesting to me to have him on the trip I have taken so many times in my life. He had a different perspective than I did.

We stopped at the Continental Divide and took a picture. Maycie was all cheese for this one. The kids were getting pretty excited about the snow we saw in the background too. We stopped at a gas station in Cuba, New Mexico that had a hut looking structure across the street, so we photoed that too.

My father, love his soul, always has these shortcuts he takes. I couldn't remember the exact one so we took one of the roads that "somewhat looked familiar to me". It was a great road for about 2 or so miles, then turned to hard nasty gravel. We are going down this road, very little phone service, phone call to dad. Lo and behold, not the right road! At this point, Ethan says to me "I am feeling a little bit "The Hills Have Eyes" If you have ever seen that horror movie, I now know where they filmed it!

We finally arrived at Kyle's. We stopped at the Walmart to see Kyle before we went to his house. When we got to his house, about noon thirty, the kids piled out of the house and little Landon, while running states--"you're here, finally here!" He about knocked me over!!!

More to come...................................................

All our exes!

2008-02-21T18:19:00.001-06:00

Some one please tell me what joy do exes have in torturing those they love? I am at an all time loss on this one!

ER--the happening place for fun!

2008-02-21T18:08:00.002-06:00

Maycie has bilateral ear infections! They are so bad, they have perforated her ear drums. She has been running fever for the last 7 days! I took her to the doctor on Monday, we had to pull lots of strings to get into one. I work with a girl who was married to one in Bryan. I was at work when I got the call, so she called him and made him fit us in. We were prescribed antibiotics, analgesic ear drops and pain meds. We got home and made a sick couch for her. The doctor told her to drink a gallon and a half if she didn't want a needle in her arm. She agreed. Once we got hom she was not drinking and the doctor called to check on her twice, the second time he told us to go to the ER for fluids. We packed up and drove to the ER in Bryan, 45 minutes away. Needless to say, they just told us "yep she has ear infections, nope she's not dehydrated. Y'all can go home now." UGH!!!

The very next day, I get a call from my husband telling me he is on his way to the ER with Jacob. Evidently, he was pitching to his brother and he hit a line drive into his nose. We ended up in the Madisonville ER for a closed reduction x 3 to his nose. We were then sent home with pain meds and an ice pack.

I am now wondering if there are any other ER's in the area that I have not been to and if I need to go just to check them out. Any suggestions?

Toodles!!!

2008-02-21T18:01:00.002-06:00

1. What is his name? Douglas Wayne
2. How long have you been married? hmmm, let's see 6 months and 25 days
3. How long did you date? we met online in Feb or March of 2007. Our first date was Easter weekend and it snowed, married in July of the same year
4. Who eats more sweets? We both love sweets but my sweetie cannot have them--diabetes
5. Who said “I love you“ first? Doug
6. Who is taller? Doug, not by very much at all
7. Who can sing better? Depends on whom you ask
8.Who is smarter? Depends on what we are talking about--to hear him tell it, he is LOL
9. Who does the laundry? yes we both do laundry
10. Who pays the bills? neither of us! lol we usually do it together
11.Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Me12. Who cooks dinner? We take turns.

12. Who cooks dinner? We take turns.
13. Who drives? Doug, I can't stand it
14. Who is more stubborn? yes
15. Who kissed who first? yes
16. Who asked out who first? He asked me
17. Who proposed? Doug to me on our hill, curious call me
18. Who wears the pants? I let him think he does ;).

OK OK OK Mindi!!! I tag Mandy and Geri and Amanda

Can't wipe it off!

2008-01-25T09:07:00.000-06:00

So........I get these calls yesterday at work. Several of them in a row from my daughter Maycie. I'm kinda getting worried. I cannot answer my cell phone at work. Well, I call her back. She is rambling over the phone. She tells me to guess what happened at her basketball game.

Side note:

I absolutely hate to guess this stuff! I am horrid at it. But here goes!

I guess the following things: her reply---

1) you won your game: mooooooommmmmm, yes we won, that's not it

2) you scored the last point: nope that is not it!

At this point she cannot contain her excitement: MOM! I HIT A THREE POINTER!!!

Apparently she was open and the ball came to her and she just lobbed it into the air and it swooshed!! I am so proud of her! She then goes on to tell me..........mom! I was smiling so much and tried not to smile but I couldn't help it. I love this child! She is fabulous!

The only thing I regret is not being there! I wish I could of seen the shot first hand!

OVER!

2008-01-08T18:24:00.000-06:00

I cannot believe that Christmas is already over and my kids are back to school. I spent the better part of the day in bed with a bad bug. I am feeling a little better though. I didn't know moving out here would make me so much more sick this year than last year. Oh the well.

This year, 2008 has lots of things looking up for the Horn family. I plan on visiting Idaho this year and introducing my family to the rest of my family. There are so many things I want to do. I cannot list them all.

I am so thankful for my family and friends. I am so lucky to have found my husband. He is wonderful!

For all of you who don't.......................update your blogs!!!

Kids

2007-12-11T22:03:00.000-06:00

I went straight from work to Maycie's basketball game yesterday. The weather here is doing funny things! You know, cold one day, 40s to summer the next 70s. I think that is why Texans stay so sick! Anywho, she was sitting the bench and I wanted to see her play. So I told her to ask the coach to play her.

OK now, I can hear all the guys thinking "Come on mom, that is not cool." She got to play and did very very well, I am not biased at all. I was so proud of her!

Love her lots!!!

..........the rest of the story

2007-11-25T12:24:00.000-06:00

Earlier in the day, I had been shopping with my friend, Jan. We work together and have developed a good friendship. She has a little apartment on the north side of town. My husband and the rest of the kids met Becca and me there to go to dinner and the carnival.

My husband saw me and laughed, not really the belly rolling kind but the kind that says, I told you not to ride the rides, I reminded you that you were too old for this, what did you expect? I started to cry. He told me to not cry cause he could not hug me and comfort me while in the present condition. To which I reminded him that "if you loved me you would hug me." LOL I wouldn't really expect him to hug me yet even touch me at this point. I also didn't find my keys. He states I didn't give them to him and they weren't in my pockets. He did however have my extra set in his truck. Thank heavens for small things!

I was racking my brain for what to do with myself. My husband suggested I drive over to the Exxon station across the street to "clean up". I want you all to imagine this: I am pale as a ghost, vomit is covering me from head to toe, a layer of the wonderful stuff starts at my chest and continues to my knees. That layer is dried from the force of gravity and the wind the ride produced. I am sick, the vomit is in my sinuses, cleavage, nose, shirt, shoes, hair, eyelids, everywhere you can imagine. The last place I wanted to go is to a place where tons, loads of people would see me. A convenience store?? To do what? Sponge off in a gas station restroom? I don't think so!!

I knew Jan had to work the next morning. The time was already late. I was hoping, may praying she was still up. I needed to place the call. My cell phone battery was already very low. I didn't have a functional plug to use in my car. I dialed the number, placed the call, waited for her to answer. She did!!!

I asked her for a HUGE favor, can I borrow your shower? She said of course, what happened? I told her to whole sordid story. I also made her promise to not take a picture of me. She promised and we made the plan to drive over to her house, about 10 minutes or so. I also needed new clothes, or some other clothes. Doug wanted me to drive with him over to Walmart so he could go in and get me some clothes, get back to the kids and I could go and get clean. I thought about this for a while and realized I could not sit in my car with this all over me and still maintain my current state of not throwing up more. He agreed to drive over to Jan's house after Walmart and for me to go ahead.

I have to mention this: While at the flipping carnival, we met up with Jacob, Samantha Mae and her mom. BTW son, his girlfriend and her mother, Linda. They both agreed to watch the kids while we were gone to clean me up.

I drove over to Jan's house, window rolled all the way down, cool air on high, no seat belt. What? Do I want this pungent smell to stay in my car forever? Hello?????????

Jan opens to door and almost gets sick herself. She points to the shower and I go. I had previously asked her for a trash bag, it was sitting on the counter. I gingerly took off my clothes. I didn't want to get the crap all over her house. I remember as a kid showering in the backyard after swimming. I was wishing I could have done that. I started the shower while I was taking off my clothes and scrapping vomit from my cleavage and flushing it. It was awful!!! I was able to shower off the evening and get clean smelling while my wonderful husband shopped for me.

Doug, in the meantime, was at Walmart looking for clothes for me. He was so worried about offending me in the size department. He says he looked forever and I can attest to that, he was gone forever!! That is the mark of a man who loves you, in my honest opinion.

While at Jan's, I waited forever for him to show up. I was sitting there in her bathroom while we talked through the door. I was wrapped in a towel, my clothes in a trash bag, awaiting the love of my life.

He finally showed up, asked for my in a throwing up voice, ha ha ha hilarious. He stated he didn't know my size but bought a big size because " if it was too small you couldn't wear it, too big and you just have to cinch it up". It was a magenta velour pants suit. A lounging type thing. Warm and comfortable. He did a perfect job.

I thanked Jan and left her to go to sleep for the morning. It was about eleven something after all. I drove back to the mall parking lot to meet up with my family. We picked up all the kids and drove home. Of course, I got a call from Ethan, my oldest son, his girlfriend, Linda and others as I drove home. All stating about the same thing, I am glad it wasn't me!! Thanks for the support guys!

We drove home, put the kids to bed and got into bed myself. The perfect end to a great and wonderful night!!!

And that folks in the rest of the story!

Thanks for all your support.

Amusement......yeah that's it

2007-11-20T18:00:00.000-06:00

Last Friday night was supposed to be a date night for my husband and me. We have been married for 4 months and need some time to ourselves. Well, we couldn't find a sitter and my guys were not available. Well we decided to ride into town and take in dinner and a movie. We wanted steak but the wait was like forever, an hour and half. With 4 kids, that was not going to happen. We drove to Casa Ole. A great alternative. I love Mexican food!!!

We then decided to go and "see what was playing". Although several movies were playing, we could not all decide on one. It was at that point that my inner genius rared it's head. "How about we go the the little carnival and ride some of the rides?" I heard myself saying. Off we go.

We bought 5 arms bands. One for me, Maycie, Keaton, Hannah and Becca. The plan was brilliant. I would take the older two with me to ride the "big kid" rides. Doug would take the little girls to ride the "kiddy rides." Seems like fun huh? yeah, that's it!

It all started out pretty innocently. We rode the first ride which was way fun. The one that drops you several hundred feet, like a free fall? Loved it!!

We also went through a fun house, mild, tame even. We then went on to bigger and better things. The Avalanche, rocked you around and around in one position. I was doing well. We then got on a flipping rolling upside down throw you around kind of ride. It was fun, I had to close my eyes the entire time and just breath. I made it!!! I was ecstatic! Not even a little nauseated---------so far!

We then moved onto the Fireball. A roller coaster that just went in a circle. This one made me a little nauseated and I lost a fourth of what I ate earlier in the night. I was feeling SOOOO much better. I attempted to ride a ride called the Freak-Out. My big arse could not fit! Thank heavens! I think I would have lost it then. So, sitting out for a ride was a great idea, right? I was raring to go!!!

There is was. A fabulous ride! One of a kind. I had seen it from afar, admired it from near, planned on riding it tonight. The Kamikaze! WHOOOOOO HOOOOOO!!! Here we go!

Maycie ended up sitting next to me with Keaton in the seat right in front of me. He was sitting next to a guy. I jokingly told him to say "I am not going to throw up on you!" LOL Some things are better not said. The ride started out tame enough. It started to rock back and forth. I figured out pretty early on this was not a great idea. Not my most brilliant idea ever. I closed my eyes and concentrated very hard on my breathing. I was fighting not to continue to get nauseated. Maycie, bless her little heart, was talking non-stop. I was trying to get her to be quiet. Not that we could see each other. See, the thing is this. You are in a very little seat. A big black u-shaped bar holds your shoulders and head in place. A long silver bar holds the black bar in place and your lower body. You are then held in place by a chicken wiresc cage that is locked into place around you. Needless to say, you are seriously secure. Not getting out of this one.

Anywho, Maycie kept talking. Asking how I was, commenting on the ride, etc. She then blurts out, "Mommy, I don't feel very good, I think I am going to get sick." Folks, that was all it took! I started to throw up! Not the dainty, little lady kind, the horrid stuck in a cage, rolling around at the speed of light, upside, topsy, turvy kind! And the ride had just started. Maycie is freaking out. Keaton is yelling "Mom! Gross, you threw up on me!" I am trying hard not to aspirate (choke for all you non medical type people). I had nowhere to throw up but down the front of me. Every time we went upside down, and it seemed like alot! Vomit would hit my in the head! I could feel it drop from the ceiling of the ride. Finally the ride came to a stop. Some lady came from the side and stated "did someone throw up during the ride? we saw chunks flying out of the top". Now remember I had told Keaton to tell the nice man next to him he was not going to throw up on him right? He should have just said, I won't but my mom will and her stomach is really really full right now!

I kept apologizing to the poor carnie man. I am so very sorry, so sorry. He looked at me and said, "it's ok, it happens."

I then had to walk through the carnival to my car. I did find a way to walk on the outside of the stupid thing. Poor kids, they were following me and Maycie in tears, Keaton gagging every time he looked at me. I finally told him to not look at me anymore.

My husband was not answering his cell phone, I remembered giving him my keys. I could not find him. I sent Maycie and Keaton together to go and find him. I had vomit from my head to my toes. Tons and tons and tons of it stuck to me from the force of gravity as we were hurled through the air in that darn ole ride.

Now it is time to tell you where I live. In the middle of NOWHERE!!! 45 MINUTES FROM WHERE WE WERE!!! There was no way I could drive the whole way home. I was still so sick! It was everywhere. In my sinuses, my nose, my hair, eyelids, sweater, slacks, shoes, socks ears. everywhere!

Stay tuned for the rest of the story!!

2007-11-09T10:34:00.002-06:00

Jacob and Samantha

Becca cheerleading at the game!

Hannah cheerleading at the game!

My boys! Jacob, Doug and Ethan

Alicia and Ethan

Football

2007-11-09T10:14:00.000-06:00

Yeah! So I live in Texas. The religion I practice is Friday night football. I have been a zealot and only missed one or two games. I have a group of disciples that follow me to the games. We are a very fanatical group. We travel to all the events and sit mesmerized by all the comings and goings. We really get into the service. I have some pictures of the games and will try very hard to figure out how to post them.

I have had this blog a long time but am striving to be better at it. We are planning on traveling up to Colorado after Christmas. I just spoke with my boss yesterday and he is fixing my schedule so we can.

halloween

2007-10-31T15:18:00.000-06:00

So...................I went to all the resale shops in my area and bought things to make my little girls scarecrows for Halloween. My wonderful husband also went shopping that same day and bought Disney Princess costumes. Guess who won out? Wonder of wonders.

Happy Halloween!!!

why?

2007-10-02T10:38:00.001-06:00

It seems to me that all people who have exes have problems. Let's take mine for example. If there is a chance to screw me, he will do it. It doesn't seem to matter how much it will cost or how it will damage kids, he will, does and is going to do it. I only have the majority of these problems with one of my exes. The other is just an ass. Aren't they all?

Let's move onto my husband's ex. She has chosen to not further herself in her career due to child support issues. She would rather not be successful to hurt her children. What she doesn't appear to understand is this, she is not hurting my husband or me, just he two amazing children. Why are people so stupid?

Off to do more laundry, it never ends.

Looks and the lot

2007-09-24T06:30:00.000-06:00

So...............I now have six kids, can you imagine? Six kids? I look great, GREAT I tell you for having six kids. I have that much more laundry to do as well. It always amazes me how much laundry six kids can produce. Not to mention towels and all else. I spend two of my four days off doing laundry. Doesn't that sound fun?

Kitchen detail has often been a bone of contention for me. I refuse to do all this laundry to then again have kitchen detail every day. I cook four days a week and my husband cooks the other three days. The kids are supposed to do the dishes but it never quite gets done! Anyone know how to make sure it gets done???

Live for the most part is really good. Hope all is well with y'all.

Toodle loo

Get me to the Church on time

2007-05-31T13:25:00.000-06:00

I am engaged! He is a wonderful, fabulous man! I am so happy. The date is set, the church is selected, the dress is bought! Kids are prepared, family is notified, arrangements are in the works. Congratulations are in order.........................Thanks.

New Beginnings

2007-05-09T19:44:00.000-06:00

I have to drive tons of people to Fort Worth tomorrow. We are leaving at freaking 5:30 in the morning. There are 6 people riding in the car with me. Hopefully we will have tons and loads of fun. We have to be there at 8 am in the morning. I find it humorous that we have to be there so early in the morning when the people coming from up there don't have to show up until 10 or so.

I have loads of laundry to do and just a little bit of documentation. Yeah buddy!

I believe someone was hurt! Not my intention. I know he will be ok. Live the faith!

Toodle--LOO!!

movies, late nights and children

2007-04-01T16:18:00.000-06:00

I told my children we would have a movie night last night. We rented three movies, bought three more and got home around 9pm after a harrowing event at Taco Bell. Did I mention my order was wrong too? I do not like Pepsi! That is what I got. Oh well!

We watched movies all weekend. I have seen some of them twice. It is OK. My oldest was almost killed, don't ya know? when we watched The Little Mermaid. But alas! she survived.

A very important thing happened this weekend. The parties involved are aware. Spectacular and amazing it was I tell you, I am most pleased.

Adios!

worrywarts

2007-03-27T13:59:00.000-06:00

I work in a very interesting place. We have interesting people. Some of these people have dementia, some just plain mental problems, some are dying, some are living, some are just plain crazy! I am talking about the staff too, don't ya know. I have fun at work most of the time. Some days are nuts! I would say they are driving me crazy but my father says, "honey, you were close enough to walk." Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

I am sitting here when I am supposed to be doing computer documentation. I am posting instead of working. Don't ya think work is overrated? I tend to think so most days!

My mouth is so cold! I am eating ice. I have not had a chance to get lunch today. Families are needy at times. I love my job! I do, really!

Posting away, done and tired, tried and true, finished at last!

Gossip

2007-03-23T23:44:00.000-06:00

I work in an office with primarily women. These are great and wonderful people. Every once in a while things get out of hand with the rumor mill. I was called to the carpet one day about said rumor mill. The things I was accused of saying were totally untrue. I had not even heard of these thing. I was speechless, a total improbable thing if you know me. Subsequently one of our staff left supposedly because of this rumor "I had started". I was totally pissed. Now, it has been three months since this all took place. I am just now talking about it cause I believe it has washed under the bridge. I hope so. Why must women do things to sabotage each other? It makes no sense to me. "Why can't we all just get along?"

Housework is so exhausting!! Laundry never ends. Toilets are never clean. Floors attract dust and dirt like nothing else. My conclusion? Housework sucks!!!

Off to bed, to dream in my head of Mr Clean and the grime we shall fight!

Little League

2007-03-19T20:19:00.000-06:00

Little League has started up again. Each and every year I promise myself I will not let my two kids sign up. Each and every year I allow them to both sign up. I am only one person, how can I make each and every practice, each and every game and sell all the things they want sold for both of them? I am superwoman remember???

Speaking of selling items..............anyone want cases of Coke products? Selling them I am. All for the benefit of Little League. I will cherish my kids and the talent they have. I actually watched my oldest for part of her practice today. She was AWESOME! She has improved her game so very much! I am totally impressed. BTW, she got that from me. Did I mention I used to play?

I am tired, very tired, very very very tired. Work about killed me today. I shall hope I get a good night's sleep and wake up refreshed and ready for the day!

I really want a whim tonight too! ;)

No More Interns

2007-03-11T19:55:00.000-06:00

So there is this person, this person was confused. This person is no longer confused. Can a person bat 100% on the first try? Why not? Time will tell, we shall see. I am a believer!

The weather today has been funky! It started off as a bright Sunday. It is now raining and thundering. I love thunderstorms! Gotta love them! I live in them each and every year. I grew up with flash flooding and thunderstorms that rock the house. I love a good rainstorm.

Kids are an enigma. I shall never figure them out. Even the ones that are of my same gender. Times have changed so much! I cannot tell.

No more interns. I believe I am batting 1000. ;)

Interns

2007-03-06T18:04:00.000-06:00

I was recently in the hospital. Not for me, but staying with my mother after surgery. You know, the hospital is not the place to stay if you want to get any sleep at all. They are constantly waking you up with mundane things such as vital signs and pain pills! Don't these people know how important sleep is?

My mother had a doctor that was really young. He was also very cute! He went above and beyond what a normal surgeon would do for his/her patient. He did some things that are normally left to the nurses. I should know, I are one.

My mother has a glioblastoma. She has had this since December 10, 2004. The life expectancy of such disease is only a year, specifically after surgery. Did I mention my mother is strong? Feisty? Has a strong will to live? She does!!! I know all the history and the statistics and I only have this to say.......................hide and watch!

So my mother thinks I am bold, ballsy even. I left a note for the intern to call me. We shall see if he acts on it. Time will tell. I am off. Wish me luck!

Grind!

2007-02-27T17:47:00.000-06:00

I have always had a bigger census than others at work. It was originally part of my so called job description. I now how almost an eighth of the entire census site wide. There are about 10 nurses. I should not have that many patients. The documentation is killing me alone!

I am in a tight spot. I love someone. Isn't that great? This person doesn't know what they want. That sucks. What to do, what to do. Patience is a virtue right?

Well, we shall see. Off to more and more laundry, mountains of documentation, making dinner and wonderful, fantabulous children.

Chocolate and Keyboards

2007-02-23T18:31:00.000-06:00

I had to go to the store to get a birthday gift for a friends of my daughters. She wanted to get him some chocolate. While in the chocolate aisle, I noticed some Lindt Lindor Truffles. Now, I must say this, someone other than myself got me totally hooked on these chocolates. There are several different kinds. I bought the balls and the squares. In fact, I am sitting her eating the squares right now. My keyboard likes the chocolate too! Hence the name!

I was talking to this gentleman who is over 80 years old. He lives in a nursing home. He has been watching the Anna Nicole drama on t.v. He states "My God that girl did have some knockers!" He is so funny!

I really want to soak in a hot bath tonight. I want to lay back and read a good book. I am not sure that I have in my possession a book I have not read. We shall see!

For those who chastise

2007-02-21T18:49:00.000-06:00

I have not had a chance to update my blog. It appears to have upset the balance of the universe. For this I sincerely apologize. To right what is wrong and fix what was broken, my update follows:

I have been back at work for two days. I was informed yesterday that I was indeed on call due to a switch that was made on my behalf. Being on call is very difficult for me at times. I have children issues. I have to find childcare for them when I am expecting to be out all night or at least have the potential to be out all night. My grandmother graciously kept my kids. Good thing too, I was home and not on call for a total number of 4 hours out of 15. Not to mention I had worked the entire day. That means that I was actually working for about 20 hours. I don't know how people do that on a continuous basis. It wiped me out! I have circles of death under my eyes. Did I mention I would know what the circles of death look like? Guess not huh?

Today was just as bad as yesterday. Seems I am in high demand at work. Several people wanted to talk to me. I only had about 6 hours to talk with them too. I am only one person. I wonder when they are going to allow clones and I also wonder if the clones will know all I do and if the clones will do what I would do in any given situation. If not, they are totally not worth it at all. I want two or three of me. I need someone to do the laundry, cook, clean and the like. I want to be able to see patients and have a clone do the documentation. Doesn't that sound divine?

I am sitting here at home and just trying to keep my eyes open and my fingers on the right keys. I hope this is totally satisfactory to those individuals who were chastising this here person.

Good luck and good night my fellow readers of the blog.

End of the Road

2007-02-19T12:57:00.000-06:00

I am finally home. I have been in the mountains and now I have a mountain of laundry to do. We have clothes coming out the wazoo that need to be cleaned, folded and put away. I did not get into home territory until last night/this morning at 4 am. Children are tired, mom is tired and we are all cranky! They are fighting yet again! Is it legal to beat children when necessary?

I traveled over 2500 miles in the last 7 days. My car shows. My kids were fabulous for most of the trip. We drove in snow, ice and strong winds. It just goes to show, Texas makes roads that are great, the other states are sorely lacking.

I am whooped! I am bone, dog tired. I will be making a deal with the devil to get my house, clothes and kids cleaned.

Toodles and good luck!

Traveling and family

2007-02-16T00:57:00.000-06:00

So, I am in Manti, Utah. My baby brother is getting married. I am not looking forward to the drive home. I am currently over 1200 miles from where I live. Snow and ice await me in the drive home. My keys have to be picked up in Clovis, New Mexico where my father left them. My car is filthy, my back is hurting, my kids are crabby. I love my brother. I really do. I am happy he is getting married and all. I even like his bride. I just didn't want to come to the edge of civilization to see him wed. UGH!

I am going to bed, need more sleep. Tomorrow is the big day. I suppose I should say, today is the big day. Fun, fun, fun! Did I mention the temperature is cold? Ha Ha Ha!

Going to the chapel to see my brother get married.

patheticism

2007-02-12T13:23:00.000-06:00

I am truly pathetic. I started my day with severe back pain. I took my medicine on an empty stomach and then drove to work. My usual seat was taken by a spot pirate. I had to sit way up front in the am meeting. I started to feel sick. I got up to leave and there went my lack of breakfast all over the office floor. Wanna know how to get a bunch of nurses hopping? Hurl around them. My back was still killing me. My boss sent me home.

I went to the chiropractor. He jumped on me. Told me my hips were out of line and my spine was curved. Whoo Hoo! Just what I wanted to hear. I have to see him tomorrow and my back is still killing me! Did I mention I have to pack for a road trip to Colorado? Well my life is crazy!

I have the most amazing person in my life. He takes real good care of me. He makes me smile and caters to my whims. ;)

Off to the doctor at 5:30 tonight!

Give me good drugs!

Mornings

2007-02-11T11:56:00.000-06:00

I woke up to screaming kids this morning. My son was trying to help my little one change clothes. She still has accidents at night. My oldest was screaming at him to turn off the light. It was WAY too early for any of them to be up and about so I made them go back to bed. Aren't I a mean one?

I always wash my sheets in hot, hot water. I think it is best to do so. Specifically my kid's sheets. That way they get really clean. Why do they make bunk beds mattresses the way they do? Changing his sheets is an ordeal. I hate it!!!

My kids are doing more around the house. They are folding clothes, doing the dishes, cleaning floors. I love it!

I think I have ended a relationship, at least the romantic part. I really don't know. I am confused and troubled over it. I am so open about my feelings, this scares me. I care about this person, don't want to hurt. Time will tell!

feelings

2007-02-09T21:14:00.000-06:00

I feel like crying. I think I just might. I have had the worst day in recent memory. I need some tissue. My nose is running and my eyes are watering. Poor pathetic me.

Disturbing

2007-02-09T19:33:00.000-06:00

I received the most disturbing news today. It was something I had to share with a couple of other people. I was in complete shock and didn't even want to deal with it. I am upset, angry and downright pissy about the whole thing. I cannot believe this news was in reference to me.

I talked with my friend today. I made him fret. I wish I had not made him worry so, situations out of my control. He is a great guy, nay wonderful. I enjoy spending time with him. He can always make me smile and laugh. I did neither of these things today. I don't know what has transpired, but I believe we are at an impasse. What to do, what to do.

I came home and ate chocolate. I love chocolate. It always makes me feel better. I have started a new medication and hope I don't get sick from it. I have a very weak stomach. Isn't that odd? Weak stomach. What does that mean? Wondering.

Apologies are not enough. I cannot seem to make things right. I want to, just don't know how. I wonder if it will all work out? Will I cry over this any more? Will I be hurt in the short term? Will I hurt in the long run? These are questions I must ponder. Ponder I will.

looking like something

2007-02-08T21:37:00.000-06:00

I got up this morning and decided to wear regular clothes. I actually put some time and effort into my appearance. I put on make-up and straightened my hair. Now I must say, my beauty routine lasts all of about 10 minutes. I wish I could say I am just that good! But alas, I have done pretty much the same things for about 20 years.

Well, I get to work and almost everyone I come into contact with states how good I look. Like they are surprised! I go away thinking..........God, I must look like shit every other day of my life. Isn't that sad? Wow! If this is the reaction I get when I put 10 minutes into my morning routine, then imagine if I put 20 minutes into it! Get ready world, I am your next supermodel. Supermodel Sleepynae hits the runway. Everyone oohs and aaaaahs. LOL

My grandmother turned 77 this year. Imagine living 77 years. She is healthy as a horse. My mother on the other hand has brain cancer. The kind you don't get better from. She has had it for the last two years. It must really blow being the mother and potentially losing your daughter and not being able to do a damn thing about it. Two years ago my only concern was purely selfish. I wanted my children to know my mother and I didn't want to lose her. My kids are the oldest grandchildren. My older two will always remember her, my youngest probably will not. I will always, always tell them about my mother. She is a true example of a great human being. I love her! She is one of my best friends, if not the best. She makes me laugh and cry at the same time. Who else could do that?

Laundry sucks! I hate laundry. I have way too much to do all the time. Basically I wash the clothes and my kids have to fold and put away. They are also responsible for gathering all dirty clothes and bringing them to me. Kids are the most expensive kind of workers!

Gotta change the clothes around!

Night!

pizza and naps

2007-02-07T21:04:00.000-06:00

I started out the day like any other Wednesday. We have a morning meeting Monday's, Wednesday's and Friday's. I was at the office. We had previously decided to eat breakfast this day. I got a phone call stating my presence was needed at my patients side. My patient had just passed away. Did I mention I am a hospice nurse? Well, FYI. It was a pretty good death call, as they go. The family was present for the last breath and was happy with all the care she had received and all. The thing about death calls is this, they take up a lot of time. Not that I am complaining. I enjoy, no love what I do. Just fact is, they tend to be long. Needless to say, breakfast was out of the question.

Round about 11:00 hit. My stomach was now thinking my head had been cut off and no nourishment was gonna make it to my stomach. It started to rumble and grumble and make all manner of loud noises. Enough so, my dementia patient noticed and said I should go get something to eat. So we decided on Double Dave's Pizza.

We got there about 11:20 or so. We always eat early. They have pretty good pizza there. I must say, the company was better though. There is a group of co workers that I always eat with. We talk about the mundane, dramatized and downright insane things we each go through everyday. I love these women. I know they will support any crazy thing I say or do. I can, and do tell them everything. Well, most everything.

I got back to work after eating and talking. About an hour goes by and I start to yawn. Really big yawns. I cannot keep my eyes open. I think to myself, "self, did we get enough sleep last night?" I think I did. It must be the pizza. I don't know what they put in their pizza but I need some everyday before I go to bed. The stuff downright put me to sleep. Now, I didn't actually catch any zzzzzzz's. But I was trying hard not too. I was so yawny! Made the afternoon drag out for me. I talked to one of the ladies I eat with and she had the same problem. WOW! That is the secret to Double Dave's Pizza! Whooo Hooo! Now I know and so do you!

Gonna go and soak, take a hot, hot, hot bath. I want to get out totally red! Love those kinds of things.

See ya on the pruney side!

2007-02-06T20:36:00.000-06:00

Just a thought about my day! Still singing, still happy. I even went to the grocery store with three kids! WOW! Hormones are amazing!

Sunny days

2007-02-06T17:58:00.000-06:00

I was working today. The weather outside was so beautiful. There was a nice brisk breeze. The sun was shining. Birds were singing. Skies were blue and clouds were white. Why was I indoors? Because. I work. I work because I love what I do. Say it with me, "I love what I do." I am one of those rare people who actually enjoy working. I don't always enjoy working, don't get me wrong. I just am very happy with what I am doing. I make a difference. I am good at what I do. I rock!!

I was able to talk to a dear friend of mine today. He is funny, hilarious. He had something on his mind. I am not privy to that something. He chose not to divulge. Now, I am one nosy person. I love to question the heck out of something. I need to know everything. I just do, don't ask. I was one of those annoying kids who always asked the question, "why?" "But how come?" I know now I am paying for that as a kid. Curious people amuse me. I amuse myself. What a strange concept.

I must depart! Toodaloo! Isn't that just beautiful? Gotta love mother nature in all her glory!

Sleeping, snoring and the like

2007-02-06T08:32:00.000-06:00

I woke up this morning with a new lease on life. I was able to get some really good and quite frankly needed zzzzzzz's. I have placed my hormone patch back on. I figured out what got me into the funk. I was able to discuss such matters with a very good friend who I value. Seems to me, maybe I need some time to myself. The matter is, I am a single mom who works and feel really guilty spending time without my kids. However, two very important people in my life have both passed on the same words of wisdom. So, I need time to myself. Doing whatever my sick and twisted mind can come up with.

I have also come this realization. I am not going to apologize or feel bad for ranting. I need the release. If I happen to be in a funk, as long as I am not taking it out on my loved ones, then I can rant and rave and be funky! So there! (tongue sticking out and everything) I want to be childish at times and that is ok. It is great what a full night of sleep will do for a person isn't it?

I am at work, supposed to be working but had to convey my thoughts. I feel so much better this morning than I have in a long time. I just have to find out what it is that I want out of life and make it happen. There are things I want to do, can't do some of them with my kids. That is ok with me, just have to find the time to do them.

Bottom line is....................time for me to rebuild or replenish my stores!

Hope springs eternal and my garden is sprouting.

Cars, Trucks and Men

2007-02-05T18:10:00.000-06:00

I have done some really stupid things in the past. I have co-signed on truck notes, I even bought a stupid truck for a very stupid man. What is it about me that men take advantage of? I must have a sign on my forehead that reads: ALL DEAD BEAT MEN APPLY. HAVE A JOB? NEED NOT APPLY. It is really hard to find a good decent man out there. Even when you think you do, they do something entirely stupid. Men must be hardwired wrong. I know I have made huge, GARGANTUAN mistakes in the past. I have not always been a good little girl. But damn! What the hell? Am I destined to a life of making sure my mate is happy and has everything he needs? What about me?

I am tired. I have not slept good in the last few nights. I actually took a nap on Sunday, but even then it was very fitful. I am not sure what I am doing. I don't even know where I am going in life. The sad part about this is..........I am raising three kids by myself. If I don't know where I am going, is there any hope for my children? I wonder if it is true, the old adage. The sins of the father/mother are visited upon the children? God help my kids!

I am sure someone who reads this will have tons of questions for me. LOADS! I am feeling very surly right now. I want to pick the largest fight in the history of men and women. I don't flipping care anymore. (I really do, just don't want to admit it tonight). Why is it that someone can be so totally honest and open it backfires? Is there something as too honest? Can someone be too honest? What is honesty really? Is it telling every little thing? Or just the important things? What would one want to know? Deepest, darkest feelings and secrets? Why does one want to know deep secrets? Some secrets I have already forgotten about, some don't matter anymore. Some matter way too much. UGH! Life really sucks right now. I am done playing the adult, I want to go back to preschool when all I had to worry about was who was gonna sit next to me and how long I could take a nap. Being an adult blows!

Tonight, as I get some sleep this will all come back on me and I will regret what I have said. Isn't that sad? What a sad, sick existence where I feel like I have to apologize for feeling crappy and well, witchy!

Toodles!

Mucking, mucking, I hate mucking

2007-02-03T15:29:00.000-06:00

I am almost done! Whoo hooo! It was really bad. During the week, I am too busy to do much of anything but a load of laundry and the dishes. Some people say, "you should have a chore chart for your kids and make them do all the housework." I agree on some points. My kids do have chores, getting them to do it is the fundamental issue here. Hope springs eternal right?

I washed my bathmats, they are cotton. I lost the string that ties the lid cover inside. I cannot find a safety pin to feed it back through. Alas, I will not have a lid cover for a while. Oh well. Y'all don't be offended, k? My bathmats are black. They pick up all kinds of dirt. I love them!!!

I have swept, mopped, scrubbed, washed and thrown out tons, no loads of junk! It is no wonder how my house gets so gross in just a week. Something I am anal about is bathrooms. They have to be cleaned at least twice a week if not more. I only have one male living in the house--my son. You would think they would be cleaner. Gross!

I am tired and filthy. It is time for some pampering for myself. Off to the salon. Adieu, good day, have fun! :)

Mucking or at least I should be

2007-02-03T08:41:00.000-06:00

I have to admit something quite important. I am a closet procrastinator. If something can be put off until the last possible minute, I will put it off. I cannot continue to do this. I must be more effective and proficient in my life. Life is too short and fun to be bogged down with the mundane. Although a necessity, the mundane is just that........mundane.

I have music running through my head right at this moment. "Because of you" Kelly Clarkson. Don't know why, just do. I tend to sing at the top of my lungs in private, ie: the comfort of my car, lying in bed, sometimes in the shower. I also dance. All the time. Just for the record, I didn't say well. I just dance.

I must tell all would be readers this.......as I sit here and type, these are the thoughts running through my head. If I reread what I wrote, it doesn't always make sense. I am not altogether sure my life makes sense anyway. I have children, a full time job, a relationship that requires work, a sick parent, a sicker grandparent, loads of friends. Life is not a race but a long meandering journey.

Have a great time deciphering this. I will gladly answer any questions. Enjoy!

Starting

2007-02-02T22:36:00.000-06:00

A friend told me I needed a blog. So, what the heck? Here are the my random thoughts. I went to work today, tired out from late night bizarre phone calls. I needed to get some records into the computer. I hate documentation. Although a necessary evil, I hate it! I spent the entire morning sitting at my desk instead of visiting with the people who need me. Once done, I ate lunch at a local restaurant with one my best friends. We had a waiter who resembled Bruce Vilanch. He was this interesting mix of little kid and large smile. He had a trainee following him, I was wishing that maybe the trainee would rub off good looks on him and he would get some intelligence. Don't you hate pretty people whose elevators do not go all the way to the top floor? It is downright aggravating. It was finally then that I was able to get to work. random thought--damn I am cold!! I have trains of thought. Just so y'all reading this understand. They are short and derail often. Overall I had a relatively productive day. I was able to see someone who I had missed seeing for a while. He always perks me up. Tomorrow I have to muck out my house. Don't look forward to that at all! Wish me luck! BTW--whatever did we do before spell check?