Disturbing

I received the most disturbing news today. It was something I had to share with a couple of other people. I was in complete shock and didn't even want to deal with it. I am upset, angry and downright pissy about the whole thing. I cannot believe this news was in reference to me.

I talked with my friend today. I made him fret. I wish I had not made him worry so, situations out of my control. He is a great guy, nay wonderful. I enjoy spending time with him. He can always make me smile and laugh. I did neither of these things today. I don't know what has transpired, but I believe we are at an impasse. What to do, what to do.

I came home and ate chocolate. I love chocolate. It always makes me feel better. I have started a new medication and hope I don't get sick from it. I have a very weak stomach. Isn't that odd? Weak stomach. What does that mean? Wondering.

Apologies are not enough. I cannot seem to make things right. I want to, just don't know how. I wonder if it will all work out? Will I cry over this any more? Will I be hurt in the short term? Will I hurt in the long run? These are questions I must ponder. Ponder I will.